A Marvelously Mundane Workplace

A Marvelously Mundane Workplace (T1)
10/2/19

DM: Whitney

Players:
 * Keros (Bard)
 * Adrie (Elf Rogue)
 * Kromax (Gnome Illusion Wizard)
 * Akra (Human Fighter)
 * Cinder (Fire Genasi Monk)
 * Der Rabe (Kenku Hexblade)

Premise
There's evidence that a cult has formed, united in its purpose to find the Hand of Vecna and use the evil artifact to gain power and summon their god. Vigil must know more about their numbers, their abilities, and their present intentions. Therefore they dispatch a party of adventurers to intercept and follow some cultists…upon which a strange opportunity reveals itself: somehow the adventurers are mistaken for new recruits for the Path of the Undying One and must navigate the cult's…interview stages and strange work culture in order to survive and return home with the information that they've gained.

Summary
"tl;dr: party finds out that the cult in the tunnels by Cherry Creek has a main entrance, told to watch the main entrance and see where people are going, follows a cultist to an abandoned graveyard and are spotted, guy doesn't attack and rather shows them a recruitment seminar, they go along with it to learn more, taken into the evil lair where they pass an interview segment, a knowledge assessment, and a skills (combat) assessment, but before they take the evil sacrament, they decide to murder their handler and flee back to Vigil"Troubled by the knowledge that there may be a cult afoot, Vigil has sent a spy to scout around the tunnels. This spy has discovered a main entrance further north into the hills west of Cherry Creek and has spotted a good amount of foot traffic moving in and out. Barry the Bugbear wants the party to investigate the main entrance and perhaps figure out where the cultists are heading towards. He gives them the promise of a good monetary award and they set off.

An (Un)Fortunate Set of Coincidences
The group stops momentarily on the side of the road, because there's a little old, blind woman named Minnie that is hawking her veggie stew at any passing adventurers. While Kromax appeases the woman, who is irate that they don't want stew, Cinder hears hushed conversation from the roadside ahead. She and Akra go and investigate and narrowly avoid a rope snare hidden in the road's dirt. Bandit fellows (bandit and bandit captain stats) attack from the roadside shrubbery. The party easily defeats them, although they accidentally set fire to part of the forest as well as the bandits. From the bandits they loot 6 dark cloaks and a partially burnt letter that reads:

''- you want to - a master of your own fate? A - of death? Then come - for a seminar about - its benefits. Must - 18+ - have killed - last 2 months - be willing to relocate - worship - Training offered -''

Following the spy's report, the party locates the lair's main entrance. While they are scouting, Kromax gets his owl killed...yet again. Two individuals exit the lair: one taller fellow and one shorter fellow with a limp. They appear to be arguing about something. They head off in different directions, so the party decides to follow the shorter one and see what he's up to. They track him down to an abandoned graveyard, but as the rogue tries to sneak closer to figure out what he's doing, the man spots them....and says excitedly, "Are you here for the recruitment seminar?"

He whips out a posterboard from a bag and several paper pamphlets. Kromax senses an opportunity and puts on a dark cloak from earlier. He strolls in and says, "Hey is this the place for the recruitment seminar?"...and the man, who introduces himself as Sorrin, is excited that he actually has people to talk to. He says that he's put up pamphlets before but they never bore fruit. The rest of the party filters in, and Sorrin gives them a speech about how the Path of the Undying One has excellent pay and benefits, like potentially living forever and learning strong necromancy. He says that if the party is interested, they have to pass a few tests and then be inducted into the group.

The party expresses their enthusiastic assent.

A Deadly Interview
Sorrin takes them right back to the lair entrance, where they meet Wilkas, another recruiter, who has found 2 people to potentially join the cult. Wilkas is ahead in recruits, and he lords it over Sorrin and says that even though he found 6 people this time, Wilkas will still win the monthly competition.

The group is given a brief tour of the lair, which has multiple sets of tunnels running ever deeper. They walk past some laboratories, sleeping quarters for cultists, and also what appears to be a break-room with a pool table and a large metallic box. Kromax opens it and realizes that it's a fridge. He sees a bottle of reddish liquid and tries to sample its contents, but a looming presence behind him makes him stop. There's a hooded woman with bright red eyes that orders him to not touch her meals, upon pain of death.

After the tour, the new recruits are given a tiny chamber to bunk down for the night and prepare for tomorrow morning's interview. The next morning, they receive breakfast at the cult's cafeteria and are escorted to a large stone chamber. There are 4 stone pillars in the middle - 3 smaller ones and one larger one - and each pillar has a throne on top. The 3 smaller thrones have people seated on them, but the larger one doesn't - instead, above it floats a large, unblinking red eye. Sorrin tells the group that the eye is a sensor for the Undying One, who often does not leave his chambers. The other three are his lieutenants, who will be administering this part of the interview. Sorrin announces them with new, dark names that they chose for themselves (Sir Keros, Corndog, Rellik, Blade, Ash, and Woosh) - pausing slightly for the more ridiculous ones - and the skills assessment part of the interview begins: Sorrin is ecstatic that the party has survived the skills assessment, and he leads them into a large underground amphitheater-like area for the knowledge assessment. The party groans upon seeing rows upon rows of desks with a test packet and a fresh quillpen. They, of course, know none of the answers, because the questions are all fill-in-the-blanks for quotes from evil scriptures. However, due to Adrie and Keros's magics, the party sets up a cheating ring and finish the test with no problem.
 * Lord Sithis: A gaunt, skeletal man with spindly fingers
 * says that if you do not know how bodies work, you cannot take apart your enemies
 * He summons four skeletons and two ghouls out of his Cloak of Bones, and the party defeats them with little trouble beyond a touch of paralysis.
 * Lord Traya: A mysterious, androgynous figure with a long shadowy cloak who floats above his/her throne
 * says that if you cannot defeat the cold, debilitating touch of death, you cannot come back from the grave
 * S/he summons 4 shadows, and though the monk almost dies to their strength drain, the bard has a genius idea to cast light upon himself and prevent the shadows from hiding. They are defeated.
 * Lord Lyto: A smooth-talking man with slicked back black hair, a hooked nose, and a charming smile
 * says that if you can't steel your mind against the dark forces that you wield, you cannot go far
 * He summons a ghost that possesses members of the party unless they force it out or knock out the possessed. After the ghost is forced out a few times, it disappates.

Some sample questions:
 * To rend one's enemies is to see them not as equals, but objects [hollow of spirit and meaning.]
 * In the Garden of Creation grows a tree of [deathly intent]. The leaves are [ruin], the bark [disaster]. From the seeds we harvest [bones].
 * When one [dreams], what are the [dreams]? Of teeth and nothing else. This is the shape and the point of the tooth: [nothing has ever lived that will not die]

Aside: these are totally just flavor texts from Destiny guns, no shame! The last section is the interview itself, which happens to be with that red-eyed woman from yesterday. She introduces herself as Mistress Vasha (and is totally a vampire) and asks each group member individually about their skills, their ambitions, how they see themselves fitting into the cult's work culture, and whether they've murdered any people recently. The party answers in the most comically evil ways they can think of, and after a while of waiting, Sorrin tells them that they've all received offers from the Path!

Now, the only thing they have to do is descent into the deepest part of the lair, meet with the Undying One himself, and take the Unholy Sacrament - which is a blood ritual that will not only chop their left hand off but will also bind them forever to the cult. Sorrin leads them down and down and down, past mysterious libraries and shadowed halls, until they reach two massive iron doors that swing open to reveal a long, smooth stone hallway lit only with creepy white witchlights.

SKEDADDLE!
The party realizes that they're in deep shit, so they lie to Sorrin that they need a bathroom break. Sorrin escorts them to a bathroom, and the group plots inside a stall and decides that they need to GTFO of this cult and inform the mayor, preferably without getting limbs chopped off. They leap out of the bathroom, ambush and kill Sorrin, and stick his body into a toilet stall to make it look like he slipped and hit his head on the toilet.

Then, Kromax conjures an illusory Sorrin to 'guide' the recruits around so the party can run out of the lair without issues. However, the 'Sorrin' is spotted by Wilkas, who realizes that the party must be lying about something, so the party ambush and kill him in a stairway and push his body down the stairs to make it look like he slipped and hit his head on the bottom step. With the illusory Sorrin, they leave the lair and flee back to Vigil to tell Mayor Wendel the events."so another option here would've been to actually meet with the Undying One, who would have bragged about how far his sight and influence reaches. He is standing at the shore of an underground lake with black water - which is the confluence of some sort of evil energy - and above the lake float 3 mirrors of ice, which reflect 3 scenes: 1, the place where the Eye of Vecna is being kept; 2, a mysterious mountain fortress with creatures flying overhead made out of bone and shadow; and 3, actually I didn't figure that one out - but these are all goals of his that he's keeping watch over. He says that these mirrors both function as spy sensors and portals, and the party would've had an opportunity to jump through the one with the Eye of Vecna in order to be safe amongst Vigil's strongest heroes."

Plothooks

 * There are three powerful necromancers that act as lieutenants of the Undying One. They are:
 * Lord Sithis, the Bones of Vecna - in charge of building up a massive undead army for Vecna to command, when he is summoned. Most generic necromancer, can summon armies of skeletons and zombies out of his cloak of bones, which looks like a black robe with a woven spine pattern.
 * Lord Traya, the Shadow of Vecna - in charge of finding sinister lore in order to find the Hand of Vecna and empower the cult. Can summon shadows and wields blasts of necrotic energy, can cast powerful ritual spells
 * Lord Lyto, the Mind of Vecna - in charge of the Fingers of Vecna, the outreach/recruitment workers who reach out into the world and 'grasp' more recruits. Uses mental magics, possession, and can summon ghosts
 * The cult, the Path of the Undying One, may be populated by a vampire..or two.
 * The Undying One is a vampire lord that uses mirrors to spy on people and portal from place to place. He has designs to find the Hand of Vecna, retrieve the Eye of Vecna, and summon the lich deity to conquer the world.
 * He is called the Undying One, because he says that he died and clawed his way back to life by the strength of his willpower, becoming an immortal vampire in the process.
 * His true name is unknown, but his followers refer to him as the Undying One, the Eternal Return, and Dominus Immortis.
 * He administers the Unholy Sacrament upon new recruits, which not only chops their left hand off but will bind their blood to him, so he will always know exactly where they are and can track down traitors as needed.